The role of respect in the post election season

This logo embodies how organizations are bonded with respect.

It seems to me that this past election season was abnormally emotionally taxing. Everyone I spoke with Wednesday morning after the election awoke either euphoric or depressed, depending on which side of the political debate they are on.  Every one is convinced that the battle for the culture of our nation rested on the outcome of this election.  They see our broken nation and society and they want it fixed.

However, the more I encounter waste and brokenness in the world around me, the more convinced I am that the battle for changing society is not in the courts, or in the legislature, but rather in each individual heart.  We have first and foremost a breakdown of culture, a failure of heart and spirit, not of government.  Expecting the people in government to fix a failure of heart is irrational at best and an abdication of personal responsibility as worst.

If we treat others with the respect they deserve and expect the same in return, our society becomes much less broken.  My argument in The Sunday Monday Paradox revolves around the preeminence of human dignity: each human person deserves respect. 

Each person deserves respect.   That’s an easy statement.  You might be reading this saying “of course!”  But look at your actions.  When we say things like, “He didn’t earn my respect.” or “She doesn’t deserve my respect.”  We betray the inclination of our heart.

Respect is not something that we withhold for those we judge worthy.  We are called to freely give our respect to every person, for we have all been created in His image and endowed with inherent worth. And in our nation at this moment of cultural crisis, we must regain possession of ourselves and extend to each other the benefit of humility and the freedom of forgiveness.

When you are in control of your self, unaffected by the irrational and emotional arguments from both sides of the debate, you can extend humility and forgiveness.  Otherwise, once you abandon possession of your self, you become animal and base, reacting from fear and instinct.  Without that possession of your self, you not only lose the ability to see through the issues with reason and objectivity, but also to examine your self in the same way as well.  Once that happens, it becomes much more difficult to diffuse your fear.

In practical terms, this means that when we decide not to treat others with respect, we are not only treating them without dignity, but we are also abandoning our dignity as well.  Both become animal.  And as animal, we are susceptible to those who would incite fear for their own benefit.  Without possession of our self, we lose the ability to question “Who is inciting our fear?” and “What are to their motives?” (as a side note, I cite a study done by the Federal Government 40 years ago that predicted the breakdown we are experiencing now.)

How do we break this cycle?  We practice. 

First, we practice humility.  Remind yourself  at each encounter, “I am not as right as I think I am and the other guy isn’t as wrong as I think he is.”  Practice this at each encounter throughout the day and then examine yourself daily asking, “How did I do?” in prayer and praying for strength to do better.

Second, we practice forgiveness.  Remind yourself at each encounter, “Just because we disagree, I must still recognize the dignity of the other.”  And again examine yourself daily asking, “How did I do?” in prayer and praying for strength to do better.

Third, we practice community.  In my book, The Sunday / Monday Paradox,  I illustrate how the untruth at the foundation of all the other lies is, “You are alone”.  This lie takes many forms.  However, in this special season in our nation we must be diligently aware of one particular form of the lie.  Remember that we were never intended to be a nation of rugged individuals, a myth propagated by auto and tobacco companies to generate sales.  On the contrary, at the birth of our nation, Alexis de Tocqueville in his work Democracy in America documented how our early citizens came together after elections.  The minority respectfully allowed themselves to be respectfully governed by the majority.  We work together.  Not, we are alone.

I wrote The Sunday/Monday Paradox to change hearts and to inspire spirit.  Now more than ever we need to regain possession of our self, and once we regain our self, to treat each other with the respect they deserve.  We can eliminate so much waste and improve our lives in so many ways.  But it will be up to you tomorrow morning to begin the transformation.